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The BirthLove Newsletter
Issue 7.7, 12/11/03
Published by LLM/BirthLove.
Recent Newsletters
THEME FOR NOVEMBER/DECEMBER 2003
Birth Attendants: Excellence in Practice
Pt 1- Midwives
Pt 2- Doctors
Pt 3- Doulas
Pt 4- Nurses
* * *
Pt 3- Doulas
If I had a doula with my first baby, maybe I
wouldn't have needed the pit induction. Translation:
a doula is a professional birth attendant (or
someone to help before a birth, or after a birth).
A doula's presence at a birth has been proven
to reduce the number of obstetrical (birth related)
interventions for the mother; like "pit inductions"-
"pit" being Pitocin- a powerful pharmaceutical
given to "induce" birth contractions.
Doulas help keep knives away from beautiful ripe
bellies; having one can reduce cesarean sections
(operative deliveries) by about about half. They
can also teach mothers about the safety, beauty
and potential ecstasy of the birth experience.
They are not "superfluous" (needless
and extra) birth assistance; in fact they can
often be the only people in the hospital room
who truly understand birth's natural rhythms and
requirements.
However- "doula" can be a corrupted
word; the doula's true role is to assist women
in recognizing and accepting their power as women
in birth. The doula's role should not be to massage
one's brow as the epidural catheter gets screwed
in, or the knife penetrates sacred flesh. Some
doulas would argue that they are about respecting
"choice"- well I for one am not about
choice that results in violence for mothers and
babies.
Birth is about gentleness, birth is about love.
And doulas can assist mothers and babies in greeting
the greatest love of all.
* * *
BirthLove is a community that belongs to all
who choose to be here. As such, everyone's voice
is welcome and respected. Feel free to use the
site to post your own passion, experiences, dreams,
visions- anything at all you want to share. Email
me with your submissions to the site- and
I will put them up as soon as I am able. Passion
is a writer's greatest gift... and mothers and
fathers are the most passionate people of all-
therefore innately amazing writers.
Writer's guidelines are linked from the Birth
Stories Index page. All they essentially say
is- "go with it"- let the words comes
as passion and memory dictate.
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CONTENTS
1. Quote of the Week
2. Featured Signature from the Petition
3. Announcements
4. Contributors to This Week's Newsletter
5. E-Learning at BirthLove
6. In BirthLove's Forums
7. Wisdom from the Featured Authors
8. On BirthLove
9. Link to Match the Topic
10. BirthLove Column by LLM
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1. Quote of the Week
So just how clean are hospitals to give birth
in?
"I can't tell you how many times in the
past 14 years I have walked into a hospital and
found pubic hair in the showers (someone's other
than the woman I am with), dried blood under the
beds, dry, caked, diarrhea under the toilet lid...
sterile? I would rather birth my baby in an environment
and bacteria my body was USED TO being around."
Judith Halek, Doula Director of Birth Balance
www.birthbalance.com NYC, NY, in response to "Doula
unto others- Forget the trendy labor coaches and
midwives- give me doctors and drugs". Read
Judith's full response, and excerpts of the article
with LLM's response to them here.
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2. Featured Signature from the Petition of the
Rights of Childbearing Women
"In Canada, my mother's generation had their
birthing voices silenced by anesthesia. They were
put in stirrups, shaved, their bowels emptied
with enemas and their arms strapped down to give
birth. Birth was stolen from these women. Have
things changed? No... the insanity continues.
Now, women's minds are put in stirrups- they have
become immobile in making choices in birth. Women's
minds are shaved- their birthing power stripped
from them by epidurals, induction smears and IV's,
birth electronics, and gazing strangers. Women's
minds are given enemas- their inherent knowledge
and confidence to give birth, flushed out by a
society that fears birth. We must take birth back
into women's hands and rediscover our wisdoms.
Only then will the insanity stop. Keep shouting
Leilah!! Thank you for the opportunity to sign
such a petition."
Maryanne Zuzak, doula, SK, Canada. 2000-01-19
Sign it now!
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3. Announcements
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4. Contributors to This Week's Newsletter
Question: "Do you have something you'd like
to share about becoming a doula?" "I
am going to attend my doula training and certification
in March. I live in Louisiana and I'm going to
Texas for the classes since they don't have any
in my state. I'm so excited to become a doula,
I also want to become a childbirth educator, I
know I've found my calling. For a long time I
thought I wanted to be an labor and delivery nurse,
but something about it just didn't feel right
to me. I found out about being a doula and fell
in love with it.
"I am concerned that because I am young
I will not be taken seriously though, I feel that
I will often be passed up for more experienced
doulas who have been in the field for a longer
amount of time. I know that it will take some
time to get my name out there and to gain experience,
but I'm just so anxious to start working. I am
also concerned that doulas may not be very popular
in the area that I live in." -Janine Cavanaugh
--
Reply from Leilah from BirthLove:
"Dear Janine- it sounds to me like you and
will be an exceptional doula because your heart
is full of love. Serving women and protecting
babies is the single most noble calling in the
world to honor, in my opinion, and anyone who
does it needs a great deal of love too. Please
remember to cherish yourself, respect yourself,
and know when you need love for yourself- giving
a lot needs lots of replenishment, even though
giving it also creates it within ourselves.
"Remember as well that birthing women often
need the opposite of what "we" are told
they need: where the books may say "hands
on", women actually need "hands off".
My own best birth attendant, ever, was Gloria
Lemay who simply observed when needed, stayed
away for the most part, and held me ONLY when
I went to her. I was private this way, and very
powerful.
"Follow your heart- all will go as it should
if you do. Much love to you. Leilah"
Do you have a reply for Janine?
Send it on. Next newsletter's topic is Excellence
in Practice: Nurses. Do you have a story about
a nurse who made the difference of a lifetime
for you? Or are you a nurse making a difference?
Please pass your stories on!
---
From a Nurse Regarding BirthLove Newsletter-
Birth Attendants: Excellence in Practice Pt 1
"Leilah, Thank you so much for the article
"In Honor of the Hospital Midwives".
Although it is dated a few years back, I had never
read it before, and it was perfect timing. You
see, I'm a nurse, and a few months ago I changed
fields and went to work in a labor and delivery
unit, with the intention of getting two years
experience and then applying for nurse-midwifery
school. I thought, since I'm already an RN, maybe
the best way for me to help birthing women is
to work with them in hospitals. After all, the
vast majority of women are still giving birth
in hospitals, and aren't they the ones who need
a caring touch most of all? After being there
for five months, I have really begun to question
my decision. I am very discouraged by my inability
to protect them from the cruel interventions that
the doctors order, and I frequently cry all the
way home after working a shift. I feel frustrated,
helpless, and alone, since my coworkers all seem
to be disciples of the medical establishment as
well. I had already begun to think of throwing
in the towel. Certainly little ol' me will never
be able to make a difference, right? Your article
really touched me. It seemed like you were talking
directly to me! If that nurse could make such
a difference to you after your c-section, then
maybe there's hope for me to do the same for someone
else. I feel like I have a purpose and a place
again. Thank you from the bottom of my soul."
-Jennifer Foltz, RN
--
Reply from Leilah:
"Hi Jennifer, I am so glad my article touched
you. You certainly can make a difference- that
nurse, in only about ten seconds time, made the
difference of a lifetime for me. You certainly
can do the same for abused, wounded women. Thank
you for writing- it does my heart so good to know
that I helped you see the beautiful things you
do, and can do. much love. Leilah"
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5. E-Learning at BirthLove
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6. Wisdom from the Featured Authors
From the December, 2003 Doula Course Module-
"Nutrition Counseling"
"Be a good example to your clients of healthy
eating. If your clients run into you at MacDonald’s,
that’s a sign that you’re not practicing
what you preach. Also, be sure to acknowledge
all the smart choices that your client’s
make. One of my pregnant clients began crying
when I said to her "You are doing such a
good job of nourishing this baby." She shared
with me that her family had always called her
a "poor eater" and that she was terrified
that she would not be able to feed her baby in
utero properly. Her son weighed a wonderful 8
lbs and is a bright beautiful five year old now.
I didn't realize how much she needed my encouragement
and am happy I helped to give her confidence in
her mothering ability.
"The support and encouragement that you
give to both mother and father in pregnancy can
produce a lifetime of healthy habits. Study nutrition
and remember to tailor your advice to the individual."
-Gloria Lemay
DOULA COURSE
FOR NON-MEMBERS: Doula
Course info
******
BirthLove's Featured Authors' indexes:
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8. On BirthLove
A doula made the difference in Carina
Rose's Birth Story. Misha gave birth to her
fourth child, at home in the tub, with her doula
"catching"- her midwife didn't get there
in time! This includes photos of this radiantly
beautiful "plus size" mama giving birth.
DOULAS' OWN STORIES OF BIRTH
Olivia
Marie's Homebirth Story Georganne, who is
a doula, gives birth joyfully surrounded by her
carefully selected women. This page includes many
photos, and great detail about her homebirth choice,
and her labor and birth.
Ayden's
Birth Carol-Anne, a doula, gives birth in
the water surrounded by her husband, family and
birth attendants. This page includes many beautiful
photos of the birth, as well as before and after.
Beautiful
Hospital Birth A doula writes in with her
experiences of a first-time mother's birth; the
mother was empowered, strong, and for the most
part, left alone. This was Katie's most satisfying
birth to attend yet.
Seminole's
Birth Story Jo Wheeler, a doula, had her 2nd
VBAC after two cesareans. The power she had grown
was palpable as she refused interventions, time
and again; this resolute will to have a vaginal
birth was the deciding factor in making it actually
happen. Included: how Jo's blood pressure was
drastically affected by a too-small blood pressure
cuff. This links to Jo's other birth stories.
M's Cesarean
Section Story A doula recounts how the over-management
of a woman's labor led to a dehumanizing, sad
cesarean section. This includes the doula's feelings
of helplessness about it all.
My
Story as Doula and Mother Katie is a doula,
and a mother of four (with one baby in heaven).
She shares her birth stories here (all powerful,
victorious hospital births- including a double
footling breech hospital birth!) and her journey
to becoming a doula at age fifty.
Hospital Victory
"I just came from an ecstatic birth at
the hospital last night. I just had to share
this AWESOME story. Basically this mom was diagnosed
with MS [multiple sclerosis] in 1999, and after
all the allopathic stuff [conventional medicine]
made her worse, she changed her life and now
has been symptom-free for 2 1/2 years. No flare
ups in pregnancy- nothing.
"She went through a tough labour. It started
about 43 hours before she gave birth and ended
in an unmedicated, beautiful birth. She was
incredible! In fact the whole floor of nurses
and doc were in awe of her strength. Baby was
posterior and stuck OT during pushing. She had
it all. But she was so committed to her baby
that she was one of the most amazing things
I've ever seen. In hospital with drugs all around,
she steadfastly showed her womanhood and came
through her rite of passage in the most amazing
way. Needless to say, today, she feels pretty
strong! What a woman."
-Sarah, doula, from the Hospital
Birth Stories page.
---
RECOMMENDED BIRTHLOVE COLUMN
Regarding
"Doula unto others": A Response to Martha's
Sweetness A pregnant big shot at Microsoft
calls doulas "sweet and cheesy". Actually...
her childlike trust of doctors and drugs is. This
column excerpts Martha's article, and includes
replies by LLM, including:
"I won't do it [give birth] in the back
seat of our car, because that's where our dog
rides, and it's really hairy." (Martha)
"I agree! Having had seven births, I wouldn't
do it in a car either- women need to be in a
secure, quiet environment... one that does not
bounce and jerk around. But if I had to choose
between giving birth surrounded by dog hair
in a familiar surrounding or in a hospital,
I'd do it with the dog hair- I'm used to the
hair on a microbial level. There is an ever-increasing
probability of developing an antibiotic-resistant
infection in any hospital; which is a stronger
consideration than my own personal distaste
of dog hair (and I have two dogs)." (Leilah)
"Really, the only thing I fear is that
it gets a little too homey, and they provide
me with a pair of constantly fighting cats for
ambient background noise. I'm serious about
that fur thing, after all." (Martha)
"I think the "fur thing" can
be used as a metaphor for women's distrust and
distaste of their natural physical processes;
a distrust that shows itself through attacking
"cheesy" natural birth. It is easier
to mock and deride than it is to admit one's
own fear and ignorance; a fear and ignorance
carefully cultivated and maintained by the medical
profession and a media eager to exploit. Equate
"fur" with birth given without doctors
and drugs: so many women have a need to "shave
the legs" of their birth processes to try
to make them as removed from nature/self as
possible. And in choosing medicalization of
birth they are administering direct epidurals
of the soul: avoiding intimate contact with
the beauty and true power that is potentially
within them. (Not "sweetness"- beauty.)
Birth can heal such a fear of intimacy... such
a need for mechanization; birth can help a woman
connect with her truest, most sexual self."
(Leilah)
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9. Link to Match the Topic
The
Print Library from the DONA (Doulas of North
America) website; a great deal of worthy reading
for free about the benefits of doulas in birth
and after.
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10. New BirthLove Column by LLM
Columns
The Power of the Doula
I believe that doulas are the next great wave
of birth attendance. I believe that women are
becoming increasingly dissatisfied with medicalized
birth attendance; and as births become more and
more medical in scope (even including with some
midwives) women are turning to more simple, traditional
types of care.
Enter today's doula, with her gentle skills and
non-intrusive touch. They are assistance without
drugs; perseverance without threat of domination;
great beauty without the massive price tags that
can come along with midwifery care.
In the future many, many women will choose unassisted
homebirth. Doulas can be their greatest assets
in creating the births of their dreams. The following
birth story, written by a doula, illustrates the
power of the doula: for the mother, homebirth
was not an option (or so say her OBs). She had
one anyway, with her doula courageously helping.
--
The GIFT
-by C.
A tiny bit about myself: I am an experienced
doula and apprenticing midwife. I have always
had a special place in my heart for VBAC women
(though never birthed by cesarean myself)- the
work that must be done to prepare for a vaginal
birth after such a trial by fire is tremendous
and so courageous, and leaves me in awe of those
women who choose to do so. Anyway here's the story:
I almost didn't take "A" as a client-
I am so busy apprenticing and am so broke, when
I got a call of a 2-cesarean mother wanting a
VBAC, due in just a few weeks, and who can't pay...
well, I did try to pass her on. But I couldn't
find another doula who I felt would really be
able to support her. So I decided that if I could
get a good back-up then I would take her. Sara's
an uncertified doula with good homebirth and birth-center
experience but no hospital experience, and in
this case I thought that was an asset. I felt
she was just radical enough to be happy with this
mom!
We all met. 'A' hit it off with Sara well. We
talked and talked. She was so determined, had
traveled great distances- literally and figuratively
to have this vaginal birth. Her history was amazing,
and her inner strength apparent. I still wasn't
completely committed. Since I started attending
only homebirths, I have been soooo reluctant to
go back to the hospital. It just hurts me so.
But we talked and she kept stating she would stay
home as long as possible.
In our state VBAC at home with a midwife is illegal.
Normally, when I encounter a client so resistant
to the hospital, so scared and angry about what
happens there, I talked to them about their homebirth
options- especially that they could decide in
labor whether they want to go or not- but to at
least have a midwife there (because as a doula
I don't receive babies- and she would carry oxygen
and pit., listen to the baby, etc.). So if they
are doing well and everything's going great then
they really COULD just "plop" out their
babies at home. Anyway, that conversation didn't
happen with A- mainly because of the cesarean
times 2 factor. I was a little scared that no
one would bump the system and take her.
So she labors. Heavy labor about 3 hours- long
early labor about 12+. She asks Sara if she HAS
to go to the hospital and is it "illegal"
to have her baby at home? She want's me to check
her (I have limited skills and said so, still
she wanted it anyway). I check and find her to
be about 6 cm. and she's rocking & rolling.
She asks me if she has to go- I say, "I can't
force you to go to the hospital. That's your decision.
I will support you in whatever you do." She
asks if it's legal. I say she can make the decision-
she is her own person and gets to do what is right
for her. I have to tell you, I was really dreading
going to the hospital and what they were going
to do to her when she got there (all the things
she did NOT want: IV, EFM, Laying in the bed...
she was adamantly against these and wanted her
doulas to fight the system for her... not a good
place for us.
Sara would do it - I'm just not that strong anymore),
she was so beautiful, howling and "hee, heeing"
through her contractions, welcoming each one with
a 'YES!" and a smile- I did not encourage
her to go. I really left it up to her. I really
trusted her. And then her water broke. Clear.
To me it was "the sign".
She started to push. She had wanted to squat
for the birth, and at the hospital they wouldn't
have let her give birth that way (sure, she could
push that way, but as soon as the baby was coming
she'd have to lie back down), I reminded her about
that. So she did- with Sara behind her and I in
front. Out slide a sweet baby girl in just a couple
more pushes, to her mother's loud birth scream
and then astonished: "I did it! I did it!
WE did it! - I can't believe we did this!"
Her sweet baby now up on the Outside of her belly,
she was so amazed and incredulous, so beautiful.
This was sacred. This was ANCIENT. This was the
most beautiful gift- for us all. I got to witness
'the secret'. And I hold it deep, deep in my heart.
I wanted you all to know about this. Our strength
is in our vulnerability. Women are NOT the weaker
sex. We are strong beyond measure.
With love, C.
--
Power and love to doulas everywhere- and to the
women who feel called to serve other women in
their births. Birth needs you; birth loves you;
be true to women and babies, and serve the truest
calling of your hearts.
---
The BirthLove Website is a great place to learn
about being a doula. From birth stories with doulas
attending, to exceptional pregnancy and birth
wisdom and information, to our Advanced Online
Doula Education with Gloria Lemay- BirthLove is
the place for the birth attendant of the future.
Doula Course info
unassisted
VBAC birth stories
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BirthLove... living the future of birth and parenting,
today!
2,000+ pages of women's and children's health
articles, the web's best collection of birth stories,
c-sec/VBAC information and wisdom, homeschooling
and natural parenting articles, online forums,
homebirth support, activism and news, Contributing
Experts' articles, and so much more. Women have
the inherent right and intuitive intelligence
to choose their own best way to give birth. Sign
the Petition for the Rights of Childbearing Women!
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All BirthLove newsletter contents copyright LLM/BirthLove.
NOTE: you are free to forward and repost this
newsletter as desired, as long as the document
is quoted in its entirety; including provided
links and this notice.
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